The Simpsons season 9
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The ninth season episode guide
The
City of New York vs. Homer Simpson / season 9 - episode 1
Driven to the brink of sanity by his appointed
status as designated driver, Barney Gumble drives
to downtown Manhattan in Homer
Simpson's car, leaving it there. But when
the family journeys to the big apple to retrieve
their property, Homer has to move his car when
it is clamped. It was clamped because he was going
to the toilet when the parking inspector came.
The Simpsons eventually go home in a half-wrecked
car.
The Principal and the Pauper / season 9 - episode 2
During a surprise banquet to honor his twentieth
anniversary as principal, Seymour Skinner's true
identity is revealed to be Armin Tamzarian. Now
established as an impostor, Tamzarian retires
and relocates to his old neighborhood in Capital
City. However, the real Skinner isn't liked by
his mother, and doesn't get on well. They go and
get Tamzarian and a court ruling is passed that
he is the real Skinner. Guest starring Martin
Sheen as the real Seymour Skinner.
Lisa's Sax / season 9 - episode 3
When Lisa
Simpson's saxophone is destroyed during a
scuffle with Bart
Simpson, the family recounts the story of
how she got her instrument during the terrible
heat wave of 1990. Everyone had air conditioning
then but Homer
Simpson, and his workaround didn't work very
well (the cat fanning a block of ice). Homer went
with Lisa to the air conditioning store, but he
only has $200. Lisa points to a saxophone, and
feeling guilty, Homer buys it for her. He puts
an inscription on, but mucks it up. This happens
again when Lisa gets her new saxophone. Guest
starring Fyvush Finkel as himself and Krusty.
Tree House of Horror VIII / season 9 - episode 4
In “The Homega Man,” Homer
Simpson battles killer mutants after Springfield
is destroyed in a nuclear blast. Next, a matter
transportation device melds Bart
Simpson with a housefly in “Fly Vs.
Fly”. Finally, Marge
Simpson is accused of witchcraft during colonial
times in “Easy-Bake Coven.”
The Cartridge Family / season 9 - episode 5
After a wild soccer riot tears up Springfield,
Homer
Simpson purchases a handgun to protect his
family. But when Marge
Simpson's repeated requests to dispose of
the weapon go without notice, she whisks herself
and the kids away to a seedy motel. Homer hosts
a gun club meeting, and everyone is disgusted
how Homer uses his gun to do mundane jobs like
opening a can of beer. Homer finds Marge and gives
her the gun. Looking in the mirror, Marge sees
how cool she looks and puts the gun in her handbag.
Bart Star / season 9 - episode 6
A local health fair shows that Springfield's
young boys are out of shape, leading parents to
sign their sons up for pee-wee football. But when
Homer
Simpson snags coaching position, a more talented
quarterback is replaced by Bart
Simpson. When the team is losing, Bart lets
Nelson come on and they win. Guest starring Roy
Firestone, Mike Judge as Hank Hill, and Joe Namath.
The Two Mrs. Nahasapeemapetilons / season 9 - episode 7
Just as he begins to enjoy his popularity as
a swinging bachelor, Apu receives an unwelcome
reminder of his pending arranged marriage. Desperate
to escape the agreement, Apu claims to have already
married Marge
Simpson. He soon gives up, and finds that
his new wife is in fact wonderful. Guest starring
Jan Hooks as Manjula and Andrea Martin as Apu's
mother.
Lisa the Skeptic / season 9 - episode 8
While Lisa
Simpson and her classmates conduct an archaeological
survey, a skeleton with abnormal bone structures
growing from the shoulders is uncovered, leading
the townspeople to conclude the remains are that
of an angel. Everyone is shocked at this new discovery,
but they soon find it is a hoax to promote a new
shopping centre. Guest starring Stephen Jay Gould
and Phil Hartman.
Realty Bites / season 9 - episode 9
When Marge
Simpson becomes a real estate agent, her firm
loses lucrative sales due to her total honesty.
She seels a house to the Flanders, but comes and
tells them someone has been murdered in it. She
finds that she is just too honest to become a
real estate agent. Meanwhile, Homer
Simpson buys a 1960s hot-rod convertible at
the local police auction. Unfortunately, the rod's
former owner and convicted felon, Snake, wants
his property returned post haste, and will do
anything to get it back. Guest starring Phil Hartman.
Miracle on Evergreen Terrace / season 9 - episode 10
People throughout Springfield open their hearts
after Bart
Simpson accidentally burns the family's Christmas
presents and claims they were stolen by a burglar.
But when the truth is alas revealed, the Simpsons
find that they are hated. Everyone takes things
from the Simpson house, and they are left with
nothing. Guest starring Alex Trebek.
All Singing, All Dancing / season 9 - episode 11
Anticipating a bloody Clint Eastwood-Lee Marvin
shoot-'em-up, Bart
Simpson and Homer
Simpson are horrified to discover that their
video rental, Paint Your Wagon, is actually a
musical. Several song and dance moments from seasons
past are recalled. Guest starring George Harrison.
Bart Carny / season 9 - episode 12
When Homer
Simpson costs a carnival worker and his son
their jobs, Homer offers the pair a place to stay.
But when the carnies lock the family out of their
house and claim it as their own, Homer attempts
to get it back by outsmarting the two. He pretends
to have a try at throwing rings on the roof, but
when the carnies aren't looking, the Simpsons
rush in and lock them out. Guest starring Jim
Varney as Cooder.
The Joy of Sect / season 9 - episode 13
Along with the majority of Springfield, Homer
Simpson and company are lured into the Movementarian
cult by a slick pamphlet and tantalizing promises.
But as Marge
Simpson begins to realize that the cult only
has money on its mind, she must try her hand at
deprogramming to rescue her family. She rescues
Homer by beer, and Lisa
Simpson and Bart
Simpson from fake promises of hoverbikes.
Everyone looks in the secret barn, and finds a
real flying saucer. As it flys away, it falls
apart and all the bags of money fall on Cletus's
house.
Das Bus / season 9 - episode 14
Lisa
Simpson and their classmates fight for survival
after becoming stranded on a deserted island.
Meanwhile, Homer
Simpson attracts the attention of Bill Gates
when he attempts to crack the lucrative internet
egg with a home-based consulting firm. Bill Gates
pretends to offer a settlement, then destroys
his business. Bart
Simpson, Lisa and their classmates are rescued
by Moe, for some reason. Guest voices James Earl
Jones as the narrator and Jack Ong as the chinese
fisherman.
The Last Temptation of Krust / season 9 - episode 15
After finally accepting that his comedic style
is outdated, Krusty settles on more edgier material:
what's wrong with today's crop of stand-up comedians.
Guest starring Jay Leno, Steven Wright, Janeane
Garofalo, Bobcat Goldthwait and Bruce Baum. Featuring
Hank Williams Jr.
Dumbbell Indemnity / season 9 - episode 16
When Moe breaks himself romancing a new love,
he enlists the aid of Homer
Simpson in an illegal scheme to collect $5,000
dollars from his automobile's insurance policy.
But after Homer botches the scam, Moe must find
a way to bust his best customer out of the pen.
Does he go to Hawaii, or rescue Homer. He rescues
Homer, and burns the bar down. Moe and Homer are
rescued. Guest starring Helen Hunt as Renee.
Lisa the Simpson / season 9 - episode 17
Thanks to the unfounded predictions of Grampa
Simpson, Lisa
Simpson is convinced that she's genetically
predisposed to lose her intelligence. She is told
by a female Simpson that you are only genetically
stupid if you are a Simpson male. Meanwhile, Apu
discovers Jasper frozen in his freezer, and turns
the Kwik-E-Mart into a tourist's attraction. Guest
starring Phil Hartman.
This Little Wiggy / season 9 - episode 18
Taking pity on the hapless Ralph Wiggum, Marge
Simpson pairs him with Bart
Simpson. But his association with Ralph quickly
turns out to be more beneficial than burdensome
when Bart learns that his father holds the master
key to every store in Springfield. When they go
in an old prison, they find an electrocution chair.
When the Mayor re-opens the prison and tests the
chair, Lisa
Simpson sends an emergency message, as the
boys left a switch on. The Mayor is saved. Guest
starring Phil Hartman.
Simpson Tide / season 9 - episode 19
Bored as usual, Homer
Simpson decides to take up a new career in
the Navy, where he single-handedly cuts the ribbon
on treason season by charting a submarine into
Soviet waters. Meanwhile, Bart
Simpson gets his ear pierced. Homer takes
the earring with him, and uses it to save the
submarine by plugging a leak. Guest starring Bob
Denver, Rod Steiger as Captain Tenille, and Michael
Carrington.
The Trouble With Trillions / season 9 - episode 20
When Homer
Simpson's unfastidious tax return accidentally
falls into the severe audit bin at the IRS, he
is promptly nabbed by the government. Forced to
go undercover for them, Homer finds himself on
a mission to retrieve a trillion dollar bill stolen
by Mr. Burns. He ends up on Mr.Burns's side, and
they sail to an island, where a man steals the
bill from them. Guest voice Paul Winfield as Lucious
Sweet.
Girly Edition / season 9 - episode 21
Bart
Simpson attempts to upstage his sister when
the pair land anchor seats on a Children's educational
news program. He hears Lisa
Simpson saying that he is really stupid, so
he gets his own back. He does a section on sentimental
things, like the ducks in the lake. He becomes
popular, but Lisa has to rescue him when Groundskeeper
Willy attacks Bart for a prank he did. Meanwhile,
Homer
Simpson exploits his elderly father to obtain
a helper monkey, which he quickly puts to work
looting donut shops.
Trash of the Titans / season 9 - episode 22
When his crude insults persuade the local garbage
men to terminate his trash pick-up service, Homer
Simpson enters the race for sanitation commissioner,
banking on the laziness of his fellow townspeople
as the key to victory. He wins, and Homer has
a strategy for making money: let other cities
dump their rubbish in the abandoned Springfield
mines. Soon rubbish starts spurting out of the
ground, and 'Plan B' goes into action, that is,
moving the entire town five miles down the street.
Guest starring Steve Martin as Ray Patterson,
Paul McGuinness, Susie Smith, and U2.
King of the Hill / season 9 - episode 23
Crestfallen by Bart
Simpson's shame of his poor physical condition,
Homer
Simpson sets out to work out. But when a pair
of publicity scouts offer him the job of climbing
The Murderhorn to promote their product, Homer
is too blindsided by lust for physical perfection
to turn down the expedition. He enentually makes
it halfway, and realizes he cannot go further.
In digging the flag in, Homer causes a slide and
then he really is at the top of the mountain.
Bart is proud of him, but everyone finds out the
story of how Abe Simpson took a bite of his fellow
climber's arm to keep him going when Homer slides
down on the dead man's icy corpse. Guest starring
Brendan Fraser as Brad and Steven Weber as Neil.
Lost Our Lisa / season 9 - episode 24
After hastily boarding the wrong bus to a limited
engagement museum exhibit, Lisa
Simpson finds herself lost in unfamiliar parts
of Springfield. Homer
Simpson eventually finds her, and the two
sneak into the exhibit one night. They solve the
mystery of an ancient artifact when it falls thanks
to Homer and Lisa, and find that it plays some
Egyptian music. Lisa leaves, satisfied. Meanwhile,
Bart
Simpson adheres novelty items to his face,
only to later discover that the glue he was given
- by Homer - is permanent. Dr.Hibbert looks as
if he is about to give Bart loads of injections,
but he sweats so much the novelty items come off.
Dr.Hibbert then tells Bart that sweat is the best
thing to remove glue.
Natural Born Kissers / season 9 - episode 25
After a near-fatal encounter with a peeved farmer
and his pitch-fork, Homer
Simpson and Marge
Simpson uncover the secret to reigniting their
sex life: dangerous situations. Meanwhile, Bart
Simpson and Lisa
Simpson make their own discoveries, including
the lost ending to Casablanca, using a metal detector.
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